Keep Myself Alive

It's been two weeks since I started my new semester in my college (not new actually, because I am already in the 7th semester). Time flies so fast, I remembered how my index of achievements went down when I was in the 3rd semester because I lost my friendly and clever friend who have been my motivation since day one I got into college, her name is Patricia, but people called her Echa. I think she is really an angel for me, she really into all self improvement while everyone are still think college life is easy because you only have to be in college less than 8 hours in one day, go home, don't have homework or anything, but she's different. She keep me away from laziness. We were separated in college because I took Business and Organization major and she took Entrepreneurship major, so we never be a classmate again since the 3rd semester until now. That was the first time, then my index of achievements went down again last semester because I broke up with my boyfriend (technically he broke me up), it felt like I was sewing my own heart to heal myself then he ripped it again, well go ahead ripped my heart out if you think that what's love all about. He fall in love with someone else, so I can fall in love with someone else too. Now i am sewing my good story with my family again, because when I was in a relationship, I wasn't spending my time with my family that much, I mean I did spend my time with my family but I'm not into it, like I'm not enjoying my time with my family. So, I am trying to spend my time with my family as much as possible, with my mom, my sister, especially my dad, because it's been a rough time for me and my dad, we didn't talk much and he gave me a silent treatment for about 3 days I think, or I can say it felt like one week! Can you imagine? I can't even speak to him even when my dad was in the same room with me, I felt like a wind, you can feel it but can't see it. I was really sad, and I just wanted to lock myself in my room, I can't even eat because I lost my appetite whereas I love to eat, I felt I am not myself that day, I lose weight without even trying to do a diet, I kept vomit after eating something. That was terrible.

Another heartbreak story, I have to make another proposal for my thesis, which mean I work twice for this damn proposal, I have to wrestle with this thing for about 3 months. I am so down. To make this proposal I have to find a problem which relate to my major, second, I have to find an enterprise which relate to my problem and then I have to ask for an internal data from them for further activities because I have to process the data to find an answer and make a conclusion about it, What a struggle for a final level student. Damn, you better work it, bitch.

But in the other hand, happy things come along. My dad was right, if we are sad, just pray, God will listen to you even He doesn't give you what you want, you will get what you need even when you're not realize. "Nothing last forever, kid" My dad said. "When it is your time, it is your time." I make friends with plenty of boys and they seems nice, and I am thankful for that.
Maybe I should appreciate every little thing more.

Quote by Tianna Kavanagh